Monday, November 01, 2004

If she doesn't scare you, no evil thing will

Halloween was awesome! I dressed up as Cruella Deville for Friday and Saturday parties. I even made myself a "dalmation" stole out of white fun fur and black sharpies.

My co-stagiere, Vanessa, who was dressed as the paper bag princess, kept singing the song from 101 Dalmations: "Cruella De Vil, CruellaDe Vil. If she doesn't scare you no evil thing will. To see her is to take a sudden chill Cruella, Cruella..." I think that's my new theme.
I want to dress up like that every day- no one sits next to me on the bus and people give me candy.

Today I really cemented my reputation as a crazy cat lady. Now I can avoid neighbours for the rest of the year. Sweet! See, Pantaloons gets really really scared whenever we use the vaccuum. So to keep kitty from hiding behind the TV for the next two days, Denise took her for a walk in the hallway outside our apartment while I cleaned. Pantaloons busted loose and ran down the length of the hall, chased by my crazed roomate, who was apparently yelling "BAD PANTALOONS!" She evaded Denise for a few trips down the hallway. So we switched and Denise cleaned while I got to stand outside the apartment holding a visibly shaking cat while my neighbours refused to make eye contact with me. Just for fun I think I'll leave all the Halloween crap I put on the door until at least Christmas. Maybe some trick or treaters will show up in late November. I'd better keep buying candy to be on the safe side.

I had another run in with my real life Cruella at my old place of employment. Since HR bitch decided to leave a few minutes early, she couldn't give me my last cheque and I can't pay rent today. She is such a douchebag! I think I see some car tire slashage in my near future...but she might not have a car. Maybe I should stick to the classics and just put a flaming bag of dog shit outside her office, knock and run away. Is that a little too obvious?


At 10:56 p.m., Blogger Erin said...

Halloween was awesome dude, too bad about Wolverine....
hows about we stalk him?? any takers?? lol jusss playinnnnnnnnnn (or am i.....)

At 11:57 p.m., Blogger Tom Brady's Naked Bootleg said...

Personally, I like the idea of writing "Bush Supporter" on her car, using paint thinner. And, if the cunt-rag doesn't have a car, let's just write "I am a cunt-rag" on the door of her office, k?


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